Redefining Kindness

Kindness has typically been defined by the way you treat others and the way you make others feel. But what about being kind to yourself? 

It’s 2021 and priorities are centered around self-care, mental health, and personal wellbeing. Out with the traditional idea of kindness, and in with the new.

The modernized definition of kindness includes the traditional definition, PLUS internal kindness. Meaning how you treat yourself, how you prioritize yourself, and making tough choices if that’s what’s best for you. 

Why should you be kind to yourself?

• Physical & Mental Health
  Studies have shown that being kind to yourself reduces stress and increases happiness and confidence

• Setting the Standard
  Everyone’s heard the saying, “Treat others the way you want to be treated.” 

  But what if we turned that into, “Treat yourself the way you want others to treat you.” 

  Practicing kindness toward yourself will set the tone for the way you expect to be treated by the people around you. If you’re being negative and mean to yourself, you open the door for your friend to treat you that way too. 

• You’ll be more kind to others
  Once you can be empathetic and understanding toward yourself, extending that same energy toward others will be natural.

How to practice kindness toward yourself

• Boundaries
  Say “no” when something doesn’t serve you. Boundaries are not only kind to yourself, but others as well. Communicating to others what’s okay and what’s not will prevent awkward situations where you’re stuck between choosing to be kind to yourself, or to someone else.
  
  (Ex: Do I risk hurting my friend’s feelings by asking them to leave so I can be alone to rest and recover, or do I spare my friend’s feelings and get my rest next weekend? Avoidable if your friends know Sunday is your self-care day!)

• Respect
  Define your values and goals and respect yourself by doing things that inch you one step closer to those goals. Don’t allow the needs or wants of others to set you back in your journey toward your goals. Don’t let others compromise your values.

• Forgiveness
  Life happens and things sometimes go wrong. Beating yourself up, being angry at yourself, or punishing yourself serves no purpose, but this isn’t forgiveness. Forgiveness is allowing yourself to feel those feelings, but then opening yourself up to the opportunity to learn and grow from past mistakes.
  

• Self-care
  Find something you love to do and make time for it. You’ll never “have time” for anything if you don’t make time for it. So carve out some time in your calendar to play a pickup basketball game, take a bubble bath, do a face mask, get a massage, or take a nap! Allow yourself to do things simply because you enjoy it.

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It’s a part of our culture and we’re taught from a young age to be nice to others, to share your toys, and to be polite. What often falls through the cracks is learning to treat yourself this way too.

Parents, lead by example and practice kindness toward yourself and teach your kids that kindness applies to themselves as well as others.

Kids are practicing kindness toward themselves when they say:

• “This toy is very special to me, so I don’t want to share it”

• “I don’t want to be friends with her anymore, because she makes me feel bad.”

• “I didn’t finish my homework because I was feeling down and colored to make myself feel better instead.”

For more on modern, gentle, and responsive parenting, along with meal ideas and activities for your kids, follow us on Instagram @nhsportsco!

Catch You Next Time,
NH Sports